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Tuesday, April 1, 2014

What's an author to do? - Nese Lane #article #sex #gay #ebook #erotic #romance #BDSM #mmromance

What’s an author to do?
By Nese Lane
How does a female author go about introducing the mindset of a man who is in desperate need of another man, from a male’s point of view?  Well, I can honestly say that finding my m/m voice has been my most exciting experience by far.
  So what’s an author to do? I’m new to the m/m erotic romance genre and believe me I’ve asked myself that question on many occasions. I absolutely love building my gorgeous male characters and putting them in the conflicting situations we all love, but I’ve come across a few differences in opinion on just how to go about it. 
For example when I wrote Keeping Secrets From Sir, my gay brother beta read for me, and quickly pointed out a situation where my sub mentioned things between he and the Dom had been strained for five or six weeks. His take from a gay man’s perspective was, “Men would never wait that long to confront each other and deal with the situation.”  So I changed the story to say two weeks. 
When I received my first edits, my editor suggested I change two weeks, to five or six, because two wasn’t long enough to build the desperation level that caused my sub to misbehave. **head pounds on desk** She had a great point, as well. The fact that she’d zeroed in on the same exact paragraph I’d changed before, was amusing in a completely frustrating way.
I ended up going with my gut and changing it back to the longer time period, because the D/s dynamics of the story were very important to me. The BDSM lifestyle is something I have complete respect for and strive to show from a realistic viewpoint.
As authors are known to do, while researching a story, I immersed myself in all things BDSM, visited public dungeons and conducted interviews. My DH was pleasantly pleased with my new outlook, and I was blown away at how quickly I was able to relate, and discover the hidden needs for my subs character.
My major dilemma was that I wanted to write a story that both gay men, and women like myself, who love to read m/m erotica would enjoy. There were several other points in the story where the female vs gay male outlook on relationships were different, and I began to wonder how I was going to pull off a story that appealed to both audiences.
In the end, I relied on my brother’s unending support and fountain of information, along with my love for m/m erotica and I am confident Keeping Secrets From Sir is a story that will be enjoyed by all.
Is my desire to straddle the line and appeal to both gay men and women who love m/m erotic romance an unobtainable goal?  Let me know what you think…
Nese Lane


  1. I'm not an expert, but this is what I've come to learn after talking to gay friends, other authors, editors, betas and readers from all walks of life.
    1- always trust your gut
    2- no matter what you write you're only going to please some of the people some of the time
    3- whether GLBTQ or straight, never forget, human nature doesn't automatically follow specific guidelines
    4- sometimes when a character does something out of the ordinary, beyond their comfort zone, it can add an extra level to their development and depth to the story
    5- write to please you first, because when you love what you've written the reader will feel it too, mistakes and all

    And thank you for the great article, Nese!

  2. Blak,

    Your wealth of knowledge is deeply appreciated and heard. Thank you for dedicating time on your blog for me and my yummy men, Your diligence has helped to make Keeping Secrets From Sir a success. You Rock!

    1. Thank you for stopping by, Nese, and your kind words, it's been pleasure to have you at BRB, and I'm glad to hear the novel has been a success. All the best! :)