A Bad and Ugly Word – Gay
Author Sharita Lira
“He’s not gay…” or “He can’t be gay…” “That’s just gay…”
and my favorite, “You sound like a gay…”
I’ve heard these statements many times
before and honestly they make me cringe. Whether it’s from random public
discussions, on the television during comedy skits, or in movies, it seems like
it’s still not okay to be gay. People just aren’t comfortable with
homosexuality, still thinking that men or women who are gay are abominations.
And when describing something or someone it’s as if they have some kind of
disease or impairment.
Ugh. *shakes head*
As an author of gay romance and an advocate
for the community this annoys the hell out of me. Seemingly no matter how far
we’ve come in this country or rather this world, this happens on a regular
basis. We teach our kids this and even if we don’t, they find out from some
other kid whether family or friends. I can even remember when I was a child, my
dad would say something like. “All they do is talk that gay stuff” when he
described a radio talk show. That was years ago and honestly I don’t expect my
dad who is approaching seventy to change his opinions on gays or how he talks
about them. However, I also recall how this stuck with me as a teen way before
I learned that being gay is okay.
Ready for a short story? Let’s go back in
time.
Back in grammar school and even now, I’ve
been a big fan of Duran Duran. Of course, because of their makeup and feminine
looks they were a target of homophobes everywhere. Because of what I was
taught, I recall defending them to classmates who thought they were, gay, and
crying crocodile tears when they talked about my favorite band. “They’re not
gay,” I screamed at them before stomping away with my teen mag in hand. Most of
the kids who were male laughed and called me a baby which upset me more. And
when I came home and told mom, she said, don’t worry about it but why are you
defending men you don’t even know personally. Good point but at age eleven, you
didn’t care. They talked badly about your guys, your favorite men and you had
to defend their honor even if the young millionaires didn’t need it. Ah such is
the life of a preteen! *grins*
Flash forward to just a couple of weeks
ago. I was trolling Facebook before work and happened to come across one of my
favorite model’s pages. One of the comments from the page moderator said, “I
can assure you, blank blank is not gay.”
Seeing that instantly put me in a bad mood. What the fuck is wrong with
being gay? Why after so many years is this still a bad word?
Immediately, I commented back on this
picture. “Even if he was, who cares and why is it so bad?” I think in comments
after mine some agreed and others had their own silly as responses. The
moderator quickly cleared it up and said, “Not that there’s anything wrong with
it.”
Ugh again. *facepalm*
No time to take it back now, honey. You
made the statement now lie in it. It almost made me want to unfriend his page
because of this but it was only the moderator who said it. Who knows how the
model himself feels? Despite this, I went to my own page and posted a small
rant. I rarely do it but I kind of said what I opened this blog with. Why is
there such a problem being gay? It’s like it’s a disease isn’t it? You can be
an axe murderer, a rapist, oh and a thief but don’t be gay. Oh noooo.
*shudders*
I’m at a loss as to why people feel gay men
and women are a threat to human society. Why it is something that can’t be
accepted as part of a person? Just like your nationality, your personality,
your preferences, just the way you are. People tolerate the fact that others
might be rambunctious ass wipes, conceited, and moronic without good sense.
*laughs* Yet being gay is just inexcusable. You just can’t love a person of
your own gender. It’s a bad, dirty word that ranks right up there with rapist,
murderer, and thief.
Next week, I’ll tackle, and I mean
literally tackle another blog about the homophobia in football as the NFL looks
into asking players if they’re gay when they’re ready to draft them. Why the
hell should this matter if they do their jobs as football players?
Stay tuned for that. In the meantime,
thanks for reading my blog.
And remember gay men and women? Hold your
head up high. It’s perfectly okay to be gay!
I think the one I hate the most is "No, offense, but are you gay?' 1. I do not hide who I am, so why would I be offended that you would think I was gay. And 2. why is being accused of being gay an offense? I have never been offended by having someone assume I am straight.
ReplyDeleteHeterosexuality is not normal, it's just common.
And Thank You. Straight advocates of the GLBT community do so much, even without a "horse in the race".